Kagome
by MissieMae
Summary: Inuyasha reflects on Kikyo's death and how Kagome fits into all of it. IK pairing. One shot. WARNING: Major Spoiler.


Hello. MissieMae here introducing her first story. It's pretty self explanatory, but hopefully enjoyable.

**Summary: **Inuyasha reflects on Kikyo's death and how Kagome fit into all of it. I/K Pairing. One-shot.

**Disclaimer:** Rumiko Takahashi rightly owns InuYasha and deserves so. Without her, we would never have our dog-eared love, Inu-chan!

**A/N: WARNING! - **Major Spoilers!

_"Kikyo, since the moment I was born, you were the very first woman I've ever loved."_

**Kagome**

_MissieMae_

::Inuyasha POV::

It had been two weeks since Kikyo's death and my sorrow has even gotten me in trouble.

I did not fake or lie to Kikyo when I gave her my first real confession. I held her lightly in my lap, embracing every last moment of her. For so many years, she has tormented my heart filling it with love, hatred, and love again.

Holding her in my arms before she slipped away was the very first moment I poured all of my emotions into.

She told me that she can finally be an ordinary woman. At that moment I cried. Cried so hard so long and hard since her reawakening. I cried for the life we never had and almost did. I cried for everything we ever had to experience for this last moment which would be her last breath. God, I cried for the love I never got to show her and rushed it all into this moment.

I refused to wipe the tears from my face and I refused to look away from her eyes.

She was smiling.

She was beautiful.

Engraving every moment in her heart I leaned down to kiss her. This was it. The last kiss. We both needed it. We both cried through it. I drained everything in my heart for her in that last kiss. And before I was finished, she was taken away from me.

I watched her disappear bursting into a parade of lights as her soul collectors danced with her. The lights and the soul collectors spread around everyone as a final touch and goodbye. It was so warm.

The last of her soul flew straight to Kagome, who had tears in her eyes. Oh, my Kagome. As much as I wanted her comfort and her shoulder, it wasn't right. It wouldn't be fair for her.

I stared at the sky as Kikyo's light dispersed and I tipped her off a final goodbye in my head and my heart. Because after that I could not dwell. No, I would never dwell.

It's been two weeks since her death. I've gotten in trouble from my sorrow, allowing a demon to make me shed tears of blood because of an illusion. In my sorrow, in my mourn for Kikyo's death, I fell a fool for it and desperately wished for the illusion to be true.

But then, I hear her voice. My guardian angel, Kagome.

She was calling for me and she broke me out of my trance. After that whole scene, I've been thinking. I was being selfish again and forgetting that Kagome was in pain too. I wasn't the only one suffering. My angel was suffering too.

From the very start, Kagome has changed me as a whole. She had been my strength in a fight, my trust, my portal to a while new life I never dreamed I would having. She was the only one to cry for me, worry for my well being, keep me grounded. She gave me a reason to be who I am and to not change.

She gave me friends, she gave me happiness.

And lately I've been taking that for granted.

Kagome had always been there and I haven't had the chance to miss her. That is probably because I refuse to be without her each hour of my life. There was one time that I had missed her so much, that I nearly cried to her sudden appearance in front of me. And she was embracing me with tears of her own. I regretted pushing her away from me. I didn't stop wondering what if she never got a hold of the jewel shard to come back to my time. Now, I never want her to leave and find myself chasing after her to come back. Though, it is much safer in her own time.

I couldn't live if she died. I suffered through Kikyo's death twice.

Kagome's death...

I never thought about it because I would never let it happen. It wasn't until this day have I realized that everything I am and everything I do is either a result or because of Kagome's effect on me. Even my last moment with Kikyo was effected by how Kagome effected me.

It was because of Kagome's tenderness and frailty that I was able to embrace Kikyo the way I did.

It was because Kagome had shown me compassion and trust that I was so freely able to let my soul pour out to Kikyo.

It was because Kagome saved Kikyo all those times that I received that chance to have a proper goodbye.

Kagome was the very first woman I've cried over which eventually opened all the gateways for the future tears like the ones I shed for Kikyo and Kagome was the one who taught me it was okay.

It was because of Kagome that I had told Kikyo she "was the very _first _woman I've ever loved" and not, "the _only _woman I've ever loved."

You know, if someone were to ask who I loved more? I wouldn't be able to answer. Maybe in the future, I would, but not that this moment.

I let my tears run and my kiss linger in my goodbye to Kikyo. It was because I knew I was letting her go. I left everything in my heart for her at that moment. I would not dwell on my past. I could then focus on my future. Kikyo was a woman I loved with all my heart. She was my first true love and like any first love, I could never stop loving her. However, like most all first loves, you move on and take what they've taught you. I took special care of the thought Kikyo left me. That even I could find love in loneliness. Kikyo was my first love.

Kagome is my everything. She is the reason why I am the way I am now. I feel love, anger, sadness, trust, compassion, everything with her. She loved me for my flaws and the good that she supposedly sees. She loves me even though I kissed another woman and cry for her. She loves me even though I'm rude and push her away. I took her for granted because she was always there no matter what. How could I not love her?

She is everything.

Kikyo is my past. Kagome is my present. Two of the same souls, same looks, however so different and yet I love them both.

How did I become so fortunate? How, when I am so unworthy? How did a hanyou like me, win the heart of not only one, but _two_ women? How was I so fortunate to lose one love, and still have another one waiting for me?

It was the reason I could never dwell on Kikyo. It was Kagome that readily welcomed me whenever I was ready. I could not dwell on Kikyo because I have Kagome.

Whom I have a lot to make up to for all she's done for me. I love what she has made me become. I love her for that and much more.

Kagome was not only my present. She is my future. And I couldn't wait for it to come

**fin**

This was my special release. After I read Kikyo's death, I was so touched by it. It was beautiful and I loved it. I also felt inspired to write this. Hopefully, you guys enjoyed it. And if you did, please leave a review. ;

Utada Hikaru's First Love, was also an inspiration.

Anywho - until next time.

**MissieMae**


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